Secondary School Support for SEN Students: Navigating Next Steps, Choices and Social Dynamics

Secondary school brings tremendous changes to every child’s life. Children enter secondary school as young 11- or 12-year-olds and leave as young adults, with adolescent development, changes happening in the brain, and increasingly complex demands shaping their experience along the way. For SEN children and their families, secondary school requires an ongoing process of evaluating (and reevaluating) what supports students need at home and at school to ensure they are able to thrive.

To delve more deeply into this expansive topic, SENIA Hong Kong and Special Needs Network Hong Kong (SNNHK) organised the second in a series of parent events about schooling for SEN children, titled “Secondary School Support for SEN Students: Navigating Next Steps, Choices and Social Dynamics.” Held in Central on 30 May 2026, the event brought together educators, psychologists, and parents for two panel discussions:

• Panel Discussion 1: What does a good secondary school look like, and how can families identify the right fit for their child?

• Panel Discussion 2: What do students need – emotionally, socially and cognitively – to thrive in secondary school, and how can parents and schools work together to support them?

Both panels covered a wide range of topics. In this post, we hope to share some of the key  questions for reflection, a summary of helpful outside resources that panellists shared during each session, and concrete tips for things that students and families can try doing to smooth the transition to secondary school and set the stage for a positive experience.

Panel Discussion 1, Part 1: What does a good secondary school look like?

Before focusing on schools, the first panel opened with an invitation to see your SEN child as an individual and reflect upon how you define success. Some of the important questions panel members highlighted included:

• How does your child learn and thrive?

• What are your child’s strengths?

• What does success for your child look like?

• Are you too focused on a “close the gap” approach when a strengths-based approach may be less stressful and more constructive?

• How can you counterbalance potentially restrictive expectations around what success might look like, whether from family or friends, or from the wider environment?

How we define success will inevitably shape thinking around school choice.

Panel Discussion 1, Part 2: How can families identify the right fit for their child?

Panel members urged parents to look beyond well crafted brochures, fancy websites, league tables, IB scores and other institutional measures to understand what school life might look and feel like, and whether the school environment is likely to support your child’s success over time.

• Academic pathways. What academic pathways does the school offer? Parents may want to look at schools that offer a variety of qualifications across different subjects. In addition to the well-known pathways like the HKDSE, IB, A-levels, or AP, there are also alternative, vocational, or foundational pathways – for example, the BTEC, ASDAN, AQA unit awards, and different entry level qualifications. The goal is to identify which pathways might match your child’s interests and needs, so they can thrive at an appropriate level of challenge and realise their individual potential.

• Admissions. Panel members noted that the admissions process can provide a window into a school’s real values. Personalised admissions processes where staff who have an interest in the whole child and are willing to adjust assessment formats are good signs of a school that will embrace your child and work with your family to support your child’s growth.

• Building a partnership. Parents were encouraged to be transparent with schools – a great school for your child will welcome honest information about your child’s profile and be ready to support them. This openness forms the essential basis for the long-term relationship that parents and students will have with their child’s secondary school team.

• School tours. School tours are a great way to develop a deeper understanding of secondary school suitability for your child, ideally on an individual basis (request to meet with the school’s SENCO). A few areas were highlighted as signs parents might watch for, including:

  • Social environment

    • Warm, natural interactions between staff and students.

    • Observing SEN students appearing relaxed and integrated into school life.

  • Built environment

    • Classrooms designed to support different needs, such as flexible seating or visual supports (e.g. schedules or zones-of-regulation displays).

    • Learning support spaces that are centrally located, welcoming, and easy to access.

  • Student recognition and awards

    • Are students recognised for purely academic achievements, or are they also recognised for persistence, creativity, or different approaches to learning?

    • Do SEN students have leadership opportunities and roles where they are seen as positive contributors in the community?

What if your child is already in a school and the partnership is not working?

Given all the challenges that can arise during school life, the panel also discussed what to do when a child’s current school may not feel like a great fit. Before deciding to change school, panel members recommended requesting a structured meeting involving the student, parents, teachers, and school leadership where needed, to revisit the foundations of student support and see what might need to be adjusted. If the sense of misalignment persists, parents may feel more confident considering a school move, knowing that reasonable steps to communicate with the school and find workable ways forward have been taken.

If a change is needed, how parents frame it for their child matters. Panel members cautioned against negative messaging like “this school doesn’t want you,” however angry or frustrated you may feel. Instead, acknowledge the challenges while emphasising the positive process of finding a better school environment where your child can thrive. At the same time, panel members warned against writing off genuine behaviour issues: a move can be a fresh start, but it should not erase accountability if there are areas where the child needs to develop stronger skills.

Panel Discussion 2, Part 1: What do students need – emotionally, socially and cognitively – to thrive in secondary school?

Adolescence is a time of tremendous growth, and SEN children may benefit from substantial support and guidance during this time. It is also a tricky time to provide that support, as adolescents have an innate drive to become more independent.

One common challenge that SEN children face is managing limited energy. Panel members highlighted some great ways to support SEN children in developing their awareness of how their energies may ebb and flow. One counsellor gave an example of helping a student by employing the metaphor of a phone battery. Together, they mapped which parts of the school day drained the “charge” fastest and which activities helped “recharge,” then used this to decide where to expend energy and where to build in decompression time. This type of problem-solving can spark new ideas about homework limits, after-school activities, and the non‑negotiable need for downtime.

Masking is another common challenge. While some degree of “masking” is part of living in a social world, parents should watch for if their child appears fine at school but comes home and then collapses in exhaustion or emotional dysregulation. Parents were encouraged to share with their child’s school what evenings look like at home to see if there might be realistic opportunities during the school day for students to “unmask” and find greater regulation through movement, sensory breaks, quieter environments, or time with trusted staff.

Social skills also feature prominently in secondary school life, and many SEN children can struggle with the “hidden curriculum” of friendships – the unwritten rules about how to behave and how to recognise true friendship. Parents can explore explicitly teaching these skills – for example, encouraging your child to choose friends based on shared interests rather than proximity alone, and normalising that not everyone at school is (or needs to be) a close friend. Programmes that teach the unwritten rules of social interaction were mentioned as helpful resources see links below.

Puberty is of course another universal challenge during the secondary school years, and the panel conversation did not shy away from bodies, relationships, and safety. Differences in sensory processing may affect how some SEN adolescents interpret internal bodily cues, which in turn can complicate the typical puberty narrative. Parents were encouraged to use research-informed resources on healthy bodies, consent and relationships, and not to assume that sex education in school will cover what neurodivergent students actually need (see links below).

Screen time is another area of universal concern during the secondary school years. Panel members raised different points of view on this subject, while highlighting the vulnerability of children and teens since the prefrontal cortex is still developing. Parents were encouraged to set clear family rules about phones and screens in late primary or early secondary years; tackling this challenge early is generally easier than trying to address screen time problems after habits are established. At the same time, for many neurodivergent teens, online spaces are where they may feel safest socially. Parents were urged to try to understand what your child is seeking – connection, escape, stimulation – and find ways to coach them on how device use makes them feel and how to practice “pause-and-plan” habits to prevent potentially painful mistakes online, such as responding in anger to an upsetting message.

Panel Discussion 2, Part 2: How can parents and schools work together to support them?

Preparation emerged as a key theme. Families were encouraged to begin transition work months—sometimes a year—in advance of moving up to secondary school. Parents were encouraged to reflect on their own changing roles as secondary students become more independent, taking a step back from serving as their child’s personal assistant or troubleshooter. One panel member referred to the Skill / Will matrix – a tool that emerged from the world of business (see link below) – and how that can be applied to differentiate areas in which your child may still need support and areas in which your child may already be capable or motivated. Depending on whether you child has the skill and/or motivation for a task, you as a parent may need to be more of a controller, a consultant, a coach, or a cheerleader. Discerning what kind of support is or is not needed – and when – is a central challenge for parents of secondary school students.

Parents should remain clear about what is non‑negotiable, such as personal safety and core values, while also allowing their child the grace to fail when the risks are reasonable, so they can learn through their own direct experience.

Introducing your child to the secondary school team

One of the most concrete ideas was preparing a one-page “All About Me” profile of your child to share during school applications and transitions. This might include sections like:

• Self-introduction

  • A happy photo

  • A simple greeting from the student

• My Strengths

• A project I am proud of

• How to support me

  • Triggers

  • What helps me reset

  • Therapist tips

• Links to psychoeducational assessment report or a previous school accommodation plan.

This kind of document is short enough that busy teachers will likely read it, and it can help break the ice and foster better mutual understanding from the start.

Navigating secondary school life – literally!

Even if your child is staying at their current school for secondary, they will need to learn how to navigate a new physical environment and a more complex timetable. Helpful strategies include:

• Walking the campus

• Timing routes and practising getting from one classroom to another within the allotted time

• Identifying lunch routines and what to have ready

• Locating and learning how to use lockers

• Identifying one or two “trusted adults” to seek out in case of questions or difficulties

Many schools offer “experience days” or similar orientation activities before the school term begins to familiarise new secondary students with the campus and new school routines. Parents may also reach out to the school’s learning support team to arrange an individual school visit; this can be particularly helpful for SEN students who struggle with change.

Secondary school class schedules are more varied and less uniform than primary school schedules. Some very concrete tools and systems to help children adjust to this increased complexity were recommended, including tools you can co-create with your child. For example:

• Small, laminated timetables for each day of the week can help your child keep up with their demanding new schedule. These can be attached to their backpack, lanyard, or belt, or kept in a pocket (see photo).
  

  

  Example of a daily laminated timetable

• Visual cues can help your child stay on top of assignments across a wider range of subjects. For example, colour‑coding subjects on the daily timetable and selecting exercise books in corresponding colours.

• Visual checklists for packing their school bag, including reminders to charge their laptop the night before and pack PE kit on the days it is needed.

Explicitly teaching time awareness by timing everyday tasks is another good strategy. How long does it take your child to pack their school bag? How long does it take to walk to the school bus or take public transportation? How long does it take to tackle 10 maths questions? With this information in mind, your child can develop a realistic sense of how to manage their daily schedule.

Weekly family “review meetings” were also suggested. Conversations covering things like what went well that week, what was hard, and what routines might need tweaking can be very helpful both in highlighting problems to be solved and celebrating progress along the way.

Summary

There is no single “correct” secondary path for SEN students in Hong Kong. The most reliable compass is not a specific curriculum or school, but whether you, your child and their school can work as a team to ensure that your child experiences safety and belonging in an environment where their strengths have room to develop. Your child’s sense of self, agency, and acceptance are what will endure and provide the basis for many happy and healthy years to come as they enter adulthood.

Links

• The Healthy Bodies Toolkit from the Vanderbilt Kennedy Center: https://ttaconline.org/Resource/JWHaEa5BS77BvPHYIRl18A/Resource-the-healthy-bodies-toolkit-vanderbilt-kennedy-center

• The Skill/Will Matrix: https://www.aihr.com/blog/skill-will-matrix/

With thanks to our panellists and moderators:

Panel 1: Dr. Amber Perymon-Evans, Psy.D., Executive Director, The Children's Institute of Hong Kong (TCIHK); Kathryn Lung, Deputy Head of School – Learning, International College Hong Kong (ICHK); Maxwell Lewis, Lead Teacher (Secondary School) and Whole-School Technology Lead, Jockey Club Sarah Roe School (JCSRS); and Kimberley Fung, SENIA-HK

Panel 2: Laura Cowan, Head of Middle School Student Support Services, Hong Kong International School (HKIS), and Counsellor, Central Health; Dr. Scarlett Mattoli, Clinical Lead, Psynamo Group; Rachel Humphreys, Founder, The Bridge; and Dr. Aaron Van Borek, SENIA-HK